What's funny is that out of all the
Batman films for my
Bats Marathon:
Batman, Batman Returns and
Batman Forever, it was
Batman & Robin that I was looking forward to the most. Why? Well, over the years this movie has become "legendary" for being one of, if not THE worst Superhero movie of all time. Personally, I've never seen this. For starters, I wrote off the
Batman franchise after seeing
Batman Forever in the theaters. So I had no desire to see this one and with all the negative reviews about B&R over the years, I just stayed away. Till now....
Sure, I would see bits and pieces while channel surfing, but it would never hold my interest longer than a minute before I moved onto something else. So, is this as bad as it's been made to be? In a word....Yes. This is a horrible movie. Not just a horrible
Batman movie or a Superhero movie, but a horrible movie no matter what genre it is. This is Campy multiplied by infinity. There are so many things wrong here and it was a chore to watch this in one sitting. It actually took 15 hours. I started watching this yesterday around 6pm and just now got finished with it.
There is no need to talk about 'nipple gate'. It's been talked about for years and....Okay, I gotta throw in my 2 cents on the subject matter. If you are going to give both
Batman and
Robin nipples, then you better damn well do the same for
Batgirl. But I guess that's asking way to much of
Joel Schumacher since he was so preoccupied with designing Codpieces that were bigger than the
Batmobile to even care about having some form of continuity with the nipples on each costume. Okay, enough on that.
I'm a big fan of
George Clooney, but he was seriously miscast here. Whether he was on screen as
Bruce Wayne or
Batman, all I could see in the role was
Danny Ocean. He just was not good in this at all.
Chris O'Donell as
Robin was a whiny little b*tch and extremely annoying here.
Alicia Silverstone was wasted in the role of
Batgirl, but in spite of no nipples on her costume, she did look good. But that's about it.
Uma Thurman as
Poison Ivy was horrible. I love her in most things, just not in this. But the worst offender of them all was
Arnold Schwarzenegger as
Mr. Freeze. But to be fair, he can only read the words that were written for him by the screenwriter. But he should have used his muscle in at least voicing his opinion and asking why every other line in the script was basically a catch-phrase. You get one or two per
Arnold movie and they are usually very memorable (
I'll be back and
Hasta la vista, baby). But here, it was nothing BUT one-liners and they all sucked.
How can you really take this movie seriously when they took everything about what made
Batman cool and then s h i t on it.
Schumacher took one of the coolest villains in the
Batman mythos and turned him into a walking punchline. Why would you have
Bane driving and chauffeuring
Poison Ivy? Why would you have
Bane dressed up in a Monkey Suit? Why would you have
Bane wearing a trench-coat and a fedora on top of his costume as if that's going to "hide" his identity? If I had to describe this movie in one sentence or less, it would be "
Batman The Ice Capades: Batman & Robin on Ice". Opening the movie with
B&R ice skating was the worst thing they could do. Not really, the worst was yet to come.
This is a
Skip all the way. It gets one star just for the fact that I got through the movie. It gets a half star bump because
Alicia at least looked good in leather.
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Topic: Batman & Robin (1997) (Read 1826 times)
June 23, 2011, 10:40:12 pm