Maximum Ride.This movie sucks. This movie sucks sucks sucks. It's based on a book by James Patterson, who also sucks. Sucks sucks sucks. The movie is made by a company I've never heard of, by writers and directors I'd never heard of, and stars actors I'd never heard of (though I can't blame them for that).
The movie is 83 minutes long, and nothing interesting happens. Interesting things THREATEN to happen, sure. But they don't. There's moments for banter. There's no banter. There's moments for action scenes. There aren't REALLY any action scenes, more like action suggestions. There's moments where you expect characters to let out cliched, tripe platitudes and attitudes, be moody arrogant teenagers who say the things other moody arrogant teenagers say. But they don't.
This is the laziest YA movie I've ever seen. It's not infuriating or arbitrary like the Divergent series, which can at least keep my attention by p*ssing me off by being frustratingly stupid. It's just BORING.
So the movie is about these five sexy-ish teenagers who can fly. And some have other powers. And they've been hunted by the organization that made them, and when one of them is kidnapped, they go to rescue her. Well, they INTEND to rescue her, but a lot of that involves them sulking around a cabin. They're also being hunted by a maybe-wereworlf, I'm not sure.
The kids are cute, Angel and Gazzy and Nudge. So naturally they're not in much of the movie. And they certainly don't do anything interesting. There could have been a fun B-plot of the kids trying to hide out in a regular school, trying to pass off as regular kids and shenanigans ensue, and maybe they do a Home Alone thing when the gov't agents come after them, that could be cute. Nothing like that happens.
Bland boy man and not Jennifer Lawrence are on the actual mission, and stop to save a girl from an assault and not Jennifer Lawrence is shot. Okay, THAT could be interesting if she died, no one would see that coming. But she's taken care of by the victim and her mom, who's a doctor, who patch her up and get a clue into what she really is. And then they're gone, we never see them again. What the f*ck was the point of that? For THAT, they could have had the mother/daughter team up with them, teach them how to be a family and sh*t like that, maybe there's other kids they have to rescue and the doctor mom agrees to take care of them.. something like that.
No, the plot is by the book and boring and not surprising in a way that's weak sauce even for a predictable dumb YA movie. I never would have known that this was a movie if it hadn't been on Netflix.
Quite honestly, what this movie needed was Cro and Servo in the corner. I kept thinkingI would see them.
Right now, I'm watching...
Instructions Not Included.Oh my god, this movie is SO cute! It's bilingual, so even if you have the captions on you need to listen to it.
The movie involves a lothario slacker who one day gets a daughter dumped off on him by a former lover. At first he becomes determined to take her back, but is soon heads over heels for her. The two together is worth watching just by itself, but it's also very touching and sweet and emotional. This was a HUGE success, and quite honestly if I had known what it would be like, I would have jumped on it much earlier.
I'm not done yet, but I know I'll be watching this again.