Top Tips For Dating an Older Man

Unless he's rich . . . DON'T.
Want to surprise him with a homemade meal?  You can't go wrong with pudding.
Don't be surprised if his follow-up comment to asking you out for dinner is, "Cool, I'll pick you up at 3:00 P.M."
Familiarize yourself with his Buick.  One day he'll have a heart attack in the middle of a drive, and you'll have to take the wheel.
During arguments, remind him whose boss by crimping his oxygen hose.
Ask him about a minority, press "record" on your iPhone, and get ready to blackmail him for millions.
Don't be afraid to order the most expensive item on the menu . . . because he gets a 15% senior discount.
Start boning up on "NCIS".
Turn him on by whispering sweet nothings into his Miracle Ear.
Always have a barf bag in your purse for when you see him naked.
Do whatever he asks of you . . . except pulling his finger.
Don't be surprised during sex if he yells, "Who's your grandpa?!?"