The Gorilla and the Redneck:
A small zoo in Georgia obtained a very
rare species of gorilla.
Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female,
became very difficult to handle. Upon
examination, the veterinarian determined
the problem. The gorilla was in heat. To
make matters worse, there was no male
gorilla available.
Thinking about their problem, the Zoo
Keeper thought of Bobby Lee Walton, a
redneck part-time worker responsible for
cleaning the animal cages. Bobby Lee,
like most rednecks, had little sense but
possessed ample ability to satisfy a
female of any species.
The Zoo Keeper thought they might have
a solution. Bobby Lee was approached
with a proposition. Would he be willing
to mate with the gorilla for $500.00?
Bobby Lee showed some interest, but
said he would have to think the matter
over carefully. The following day, he
announced that he would accept their
offer, but only under five conditions:
"First", Bobby Lee said, "I ain't gonna
kiss her on the lips." The Keeper quickly
agreed to this condition.
"Second", he said, "She must wear a
'Dale Earnhardt Forever' T-Shirt." The
keeper again readily agreed to this
condition.
"Third", he said, "you can't never tell no
one about this." The keeper again
readily agreed to this condition.
"Fourth", Bobby Lee said, "I want all the
children raised Southern Baptist." Once
again it was agreed.
"And last," Bobby Lee said, "I'll need
another week to come up with the $500.00.